Knock Knock, Its me…Matt

.
Hola friendos! Welcome to the place where jewnicorns not unlike the above rendition roam free! DEFINITION OF A JEWNICORN:
“A deliciously Jewish Unicorn. Usually wearing a yamacha on it’s one horn, and prancing throughout the plains. When threatened, it will defend it’s self using a glistening menorah. It’s call can be heard everywhere as “Oy!, I am feeling very veklempt!” Dave Kelly: Dude, did you just hear that? I think it’s a Jewnicorn!
Echo: veklempt,klempt, klempt…where are my good socks?
Jim: uh..that kinda weirds me out…let’s go
Dave: NO!, WE MUST OFFER IT LATKAS! It could become hostile, or become riddled with extreme angst and hebrew wizardry!
Jim: uhh..yeah..you do that…I’ma go watch full house…those things are freaking..odd…man…*walks away while watching trees sternly*
Jewnicornriffic…”
———————————————————————————————————-
Ignoring how offensive the picture,the definition and title of this blog are, lets charge ahead, shall we?
I guess we gotta do the whole intro thing. I am Matt, I live in southern Cali, and I am going to school to learn how to sell you shit you dont want, need, and will never use (Advertising). I host a podcast that has some issues with talent lately, and by talent I mean I have yet to find somewhat to co-host with me (and also I lack talent). I love doing it though. If America was ready for “so you think you can dance” my podcast should really be airing on CBS radio by now.I have to give all the credit for this blog existing to my good friend @caliguy. If it weren’t for him, I would be spending time doing homework, sleeping, being outdoors, getting a job, getting a haircut…really anything productive at all. Also hello to @retardoedstar who is for some reason also supporting delinquency to life.
Uh, ok a few housekeeping items here: comment if you want, add posts to my page by all means (I think enabled that), and help me promote this thing. I actually don’t know about that last one. I don’t know if this should be promoted. Maybe it should just be one of those creepy blogs that links to porn and only strangers can find it. I’ll get back to you on that. I will update often, but will rarely say anything. These are some topics you might find on here (not limited to): Why I hate Cheney Washington, people who take pictures of nothing and post them on facebook, lint, funny things children say to adults, my relationship troubles, @caliguys relationship troubles, football, baseball, why hockey is not a sport, and MANY MANY MORE!
Ok, in the interest of not overdoing it in my first post I am gonna put this one down. Hope to see you guys back and hope you will all be interactive, yell, scream, and throw things. Talk to you all soon kiddies.
No mountain too high.